Chapter 7: When the Streets Became Home

After all the bullshit, I thought I had just enough game to be on my own once again. I was tired. Tired of the bullshit, tired of these niggas, tired of people trying to control me. I was ready to do my own shit.

Thank God I was back in Oakland.

At least Oakland was familiar.

I knew just enough to stack up. Being that I wasn’t 18 yet, I jumped into scamming and gangs. Man things was crazy.

See, Oakland ain’t really have Bloods and Crips like that. We have hoods… blocks. And when somebody get killed, people carry their names like a movement, turned them into something bigger. At least that’s how I saw it growing up.

Everybody was outside.

DNI. STI. Hyphy boys. Nut cases.

I could go on. Times was different.

When you young, it never really hits you when your mama tell you the streets will eat you up and spit you out. You hear it, but you don’t really understand it until life starts showing you exactly what she meant.

By then, I was drained… but still going.

Even though I was learning a different hustle, I was considered grown, and that’s exactly how people treated me.

Like a grown woman.

And honestly, there was pros and cons to it.

See with scamming , I wasn’t standing outside in the streets like before. I was warm. Traveling. Had my own schedule. Still making money.

But if I’m being real…

It wasn’t nothing like fast money.

I got bored.

I missed being outside.

As crazy as it sounds, the streets gave me an adrenaline rush. I liked being able to buy what I wanted. Stay in nice hotels. Smoke good weed. Move how I wanted.

I would call home from time to time just to let my mama know I was alive.

Of course, she wanted me to come home.

She would pressure me, and every time we talked, I carried guilt in my heart.

Because deep down, I knew what I was doing was wrong. But I also didn’t want to go back.

Eventually, I did.

And just like always, the moment things started feeling normal… life shifted again. Everywhere I went, I attracted men. Tricks. Pimps. Men looking at me like I was already grown.

Part of me was sick of it.

Truth be told, part of me still just wanted to be a kid. But life wasn’t giving me that option.

Somehow, I ended up running into my mom’s coworker, who had a brother that was a pimp. I ended up staying with him over on Foothill, right near the blade. He already had another girl working beside him.

As time went on, he found out how old I really was.

Months later, he ended up taking me home.

At least for a second.

But I was bringing in too much money.

So just a few months later… he came back.

By then, his sister stayed over on International.

Crazy part is, they knew my age.

They knew my mama.

They knew it was wrong.

And still…

I found myself standing right there on the corner of 26th and International. Funny how one corner can change your whole life.

Because that corner came with robbery.

Abuse.

Pain.

Survival.

And eventually…

Me meeting my child’s father.

Man, life just never settled down.

And all of this…

At just 16.